For Birth Parents and Prospective Parents

Adoption Without Fear
James L. Gritter

James Gritter, a social worker who was a pioneer in the transition from closed to open adoptions, gathers the stories of seventeen couples who tell of their experience with open adoption, ranging from occasional contact, to sharing the birth experience, and their lives beyond.  While each relationship has its unique qualities there are also many common threads in these emotion-filled and often complex family stories.  Published 20 years ago, this book still has relevance for families today.




Children of Open Adoption and Their Families
Kathleen Silber and Patricia Martinez Dorner

Written in the early days of open adoption, this sequel to the original Dear Birthmother provided information about families where there was some direct contact between members of the birth and adoptive families.  Again using personal accounts and letters, the primary focus was on the effect of open adoption on the children.  Looking at a range of issues from infancy through the teen years, the authors conclude with a chapter detailing the long-term benefits of open adoption for all members of the triad.




Dear Birthmother, Thank You for Our Baby
Kathleen Silber and Patricia Martinez Dorner

The 3rd revision of this open adoption classic reflects current adoption practices and begins by dispelling some long-held myths.  Using personal accounts and sample letters exchanged between adoptive family members and birthparent family members, the book provides a rich picture of each member of the adoption triad’s feelings and experiences as their relationships evolve over time.  The authors include specific strategies and practical suggestions as they make a strong case for open adoption throughout.




Making Room in Our Hearts: Keeping Family Ties through Open Adoption
Micky Duxbury

An up-to-date, informative and enlightening book about why child-centered open adoption makes so much sense.  Micky Duxbury is an adoption educator, therapist and adoptive parent.  She presents the stories of families who are living in open adoptions, giving readers an insider’ view of the open adoption experience, its rewards, challenges and complexity.





Out of the Shadows: Birthfathers’ Stories
Mary Martin Mason

Based on in-depth interviews, this book profiles a diverse group of men “who have fathered a child whom they are not parenting” including, but not only, through adoption.  Common issues emerge in their often-painful stories: grief, regret and shame, damage to self-esteem and subsequent relationships, and lasting feelings for the child.  Besides the emotional cost to the birthfather, Mason also examines the impact of shutting out birthfathers on adoptive parents and children.




Pregnant? Adoption is an Option: Making an Adoption Plan for a Child
Jeanne Warren Lindsay and Jami Moffett

For “every parent-to-be who is not positive that this is the time to parent,” this book presents the issues to take into account when considering adoption as an option: making the decision, selecting adoptive parents, the birth, placement ceremonies, the natural grieving process, planning for the future, and building open adoption relationships.  It also addresses the emotional issues that are likely to arise and how counseling is useful.  Use of birthparent interviews adds depth to the understanding of the birthparents’ experience.




Shattered Dreams – Lonely Choices: Birthparents of Babies with Disabilities Talk About Adoption
Joanne Finnegan

The stories of families (including the author’s) who explored options other than raising their child with a disability.  Offers information and guidance about the issues involved for those who may face this decision as well as to the professionals who will be providing care and support to these birthparents.  Topics include making decisions, finding support, dealing with family issues, finalizing an adoption plan and living with the decision.  It is also helpful for prospective adoptive parents to understand these birthparents’ experiences.




The Open Adoption Experience: A Complete Guide for Adoptive and Birth Families
Lois R. Melina and Sharon K. Roszia

This thorough and practical guide will “help demystify open adoption from the initial preparation, to placement and the adjustments of the first year, through the challenges of adolescence.  Also offers a detailed discussion of the many advantages of open adoption, as well as the common problems, helping adoptive and birth families to know what to expect as the relationship unfolds, and how other families have coped with the unexpected.”  This is a useful resource book for the lifetime of an open adoption relationship.




Adults often need an agency to help them look for information about their history. State law permits the agency to provide adult adoptees with all of the non-identifying information available in the case record. Adoption Resources Inc. will assist adult adoptees.